Yui's Panties!
by Flipperclaws
Summary: Yui plays the brown note, and...
1. Chapter 1

**YUI'S PANTIES!**

"... You shouldn't eat snow cones and tempura together, or you'll get sick..."

"Ah..."

Uh-oh... Yui had just eaten the two forbidden foods!

A list of potential catastrophes paraded through the girl's mind. Would she be glued to the toilet seat forever? Would she be denied her favourite foods from now on? Would she be confined to her bed, doomed to miss the next school festival? Would she die without learning to snap her fingers?

But help, as always, was nearby.

"Azu-nyan, what am I going to do..."

But nothing happened to her...

-X-X-X-X-X-

... Until a week later.

"Azu-nyan! Listen to this! I came up with it last night while brushing my teeth!"

"But I've never heard of this chord before..." Azusa remarked, shaking her head.

"You just have to listen to it! Here I go!"

She strummed the Les Paul just once.

Ritsu tapped her foot. "I can't hear a thing."

Azusa frowned. "I don't think you should play it again, Yui-senpai."

"Ehhh! Give me another chance!"

Yui fiddled with the amplifier. That being done, she held her guitar close, narrowing her eyes at her fellow club members.

"All right, Gitah! Let's show them what we can really do! Don't disappoint me!"

Yui's arm vanished in a blinding turboprop whirl of motion.

At last the girls could hear something - a series of low, atonal, rumbling noises that battered their eardrums.

Ritsu trembled, her knees knocking in time with the beat.

Mio fell to her knees. "Hlech!" Several strands of yakisoba escaped from her mouth.

Mugi clawed open the windows, gasping for breath.

Azusa could not shake off that feeling that something terrible would happen to Yui-senpai...

Ton-chan turned over in her tank.

"TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"

"What was that?"

"Ah..."

A rancid, oily smell quickly filled the room... it was like tempura, gone really, really bad.

Azusa sighed. It was as she had foreseen. "Yui-senpai, did you..."

"Um..." She was feeling wet and warm, but in the wrong place!

A huge drop of brown liquid appeared on the floor. And another. And a third.

Before she knew it, Ricchan was dragging her away. "Come on, you really need to go to the toilet, right now!"

-X-X-X-X-X-

Tsumugi chuckled as she rinsed the Dettol-soaked cloth. Now the music room smelled of the disinfectant. It wasn't natural, yet it was sickeningly light and sweet all the same. She could get used to this.

Yui finally returned, her socks peeking out of her pockets, her skirt quite damp, rivulets of water running down her legs.

Mio shook her head. "You can't go around like that, Yui."

"But where am I going to find a pair of panties?" This task would be as impossible as searching for takuan in the school.

"I know!"

The drummer girl stepped into the storeroom, which had gotten messy again after the cleanup they'd done in the spring. But it took only a moment for her to find what she needed. She emerged triumphantly with a plastic package in hand.

Ritsu bunched up her hair. Her face was contorted with a look of concern.

"Onee-chan no taitsu!"

Ui had thought about almost everything. She'd foreseen that Yui might get a run in her tights, or lose them somehow, and had laid in a spare pair where it could be found, if not by her sister, then by someone else. Yui almost never wore tights with her summer uniform, so this pair of tights had stayed in the storeroom, forgotten by all... until now.

"Huh?"

"Don't you get it, Yui? You can wear these instead! Come on, ditch your panties and put these on! Quick, before you get a cold!"

"All right!"

"W- wait, Yui! You can't wear tights without underwear!"

"Don't be so old-fashioned, Mio! Lots of people treat tights and pantyhose as underwear, they don't wear anything underneath!"

"They're all crazy! You don't have to follow them!"

Yui gratefully slipped off her sodden undies and slid on the nice, dry pair of tights.

"Let me wash it for you, Yui-chan." Mugi promptly dropped the panties in a bucket of Dettol, sitting down and humming _Pure Pure Heart _as she proceeded to scrub away the worst of the stains.

Ricchan smiled. Tsumugi was a Cinderella in reverse, a princess yearning to live like a pauper. She'd found her niche in life all right. Good thing Japan Women's University offered a course in home economics.

Meanwhile, Yui-chan had discovered the pleasure in simple things like walking, running and jumping around, enjoying her new-found freedom.

"Oooh! It feels great! It's as if I'm not wearing anything!"

"All of you have lost it..." Mio shook her head. What would happen to Yui if her wardrobe were to malfunction for any reason? She would be doomed to remain celibate for the rest of her life... just like Mio herself...

But she hadn't time to worry about Yui's marriage prospects. The clock told her that it was five minutes to ten. They were here today to attend a remedial class, and they were running late!

"We've got to go. There's a class to attend," she reminded the rest.

"Urgh!" Ritsu would be next to lose control of her bowels. It was the dreaded eigo! And literature too! And taught by the humourless Horikomi-sensei! A triple whammy!

The girls got their things ready... except for the keyboardist, who was still giving Yui's intimate apparel her most tender attentions.

"Mugi..."

"I'm done!" Mugi unveiled a freshly laundered pair of panties to the band.

Now the light music club was given an opportunity to check out the latest underwear trends, courtesy of Yui, dutiful follower of teenage fashions.

"Ui-chan?"

Yui rubbed her tummy. "Oops... I must've gotten it mixed up again..."

-X-X-X-X-X-

"... Here you see Gulliver putting out the fire by urinating on the palace. Instead of being praised, however, he earns the queen's enmity. This is a veiled reference to one of Swift's novels, which he wrote in honour of the Queen of England. Unfortunately, the Queen did not like the book at all, and here Swift is getting back at her, accusing her of being ungrateful."

Horikomi-sensei looked up at the class. "Now, do you know which book Swift is referring to here?"

He chanced upon Yui, who was all over her desk, expressing a longing for some tempura Mars bars with sea-salt ice cream.

"Hirasawa-san!"

"Hmph?" Her head climbed up like a balloon, tethered to the table by a string of saliva.

"Perhaps you would like to answer this question! On the blackboard, if you please!"

"_A Tale of a Tub_," someone whispered just loud enough for Yui to pick up.

"I got it, Nodoka-chan!" she announced.

The others merely smiled.

She rubbed the sleep away, and stumbled to the front.

"... Rrrrrr-iiiiiiiiii-ppppppppp!"

Before she knew it, she was on the floor, staring at the teacher's shoes. But she quickly regained her feet, and sprinted to the blackboard.

She scrawled in her answer... to the excited gasps and cheers of the class.

"Huh?"

Horikomi-sensei was speechless. The hair dropped off his head, exposing the baldness beneath. Sawa-chan had told the truth this time!

Yui turned around. Her attention was quickly drawn to Himeko's desk. From a hook hung her neighbour's school bag...

... And her skirt.

She had fallen foul of the S-Breaker.

The cheers became louder. Students from all over the school crowded the doors and windows, all eager to have a piece of the action. It was the first year cultural festival, all over again!

There was a burst of light, and a loud click!

"Ahhh..." Just a hint of colour on her cheeks, she sheepishly retrieved her skirt, putting it back where it was supposed to be...

... But it just dropped to her feet, too ashamed to protect her modesty any more.

"Iiiiiiiiiiiiyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

"Mio-chan?"

-X-X-X-X-X-

_The next day..._

"Everybody!"

Mugi-chan was positively beaming.

"For tea today, I've prepared a special dish in honour of Yui-chan!"

She laid a steaming plate on the table. "Tako-nashi-yaki!"

Octopus dumplings... sans octopus.

Yui was first with her chopsticks. "Ooooh! I'll have one, Mugi-chan!"

As expected, one dumpling wasn't enough to satisfy her hunger. Yui soon started on another. And a third. But the princess had come prepared.

Mio crossed her arms and her legs. "Have you no shame, Yui? How can you keep eating like that after what happened? No one will want to marry you after this!" It was hot today, and the air-con wasn't working too well. Yet she was wearing her blazer, and her coat on top of that.

"Good afternoon!" Sawako sashayed in, a smile on her face. "And to you, Yui-chan!"

She took a long look under the table, and her smile narrowed. Yui was back to normal again. Plain, vanilla Yui.

But there was someone else for her to pick on. For she'd discovered that the bassist had adjusted her skirt for maximum length, so that nothing could possibly be exposed.

"And you, Mio-chan... _Why... so... serious?_"

"Hyaaaaaa!"

Mio fell off her seat, having received a face full of her club advisor.

While the others were distracted, Tsumugi took her usual gander at Yamanaka-sensei. Their HR teacher was dressed tastefully as always, with a cardigan, a pastel-coloured sun dress and a pair of platforms. She looked a little further down. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary at first. But her trained eye quickly noticed the sunlight dancing off the lady's legs. Beyond a doubt, Sawako was wearing pantyhose, so sheer it was barely there!

This was what made life worth living.

Having had her fill of bullying the bassist, Sawa-chan focused her attentions on Yui-chan anew.

"You're a celebrity now, my dear. Your photos are all over everyone's Facebook! There's even a lovely video of you on the front page of Youtube. I'm really happy for you."

Sawako was sitting on Yui the next moment, kneading her student's face!

"But what about _me_? Why do they go only for an airhead with such tiny breasts? Am I not good enough for them? Why don't they think about _me _for a minute? _WHY_?"

Ricchan leaned back in her chair. "That's skinship for you." Her listener wasn't paying attention though.

Sawa-chan-sensei stood up, straightening her clothes. "You've got guts, Yui-chan... But you certainly aren't the first to do this. You see!"

The teacher hiked up her dress, just like Leonore Capell.

"Hyyyuuuuuuuuuu!"

A bell rang, and Mio was turned to stone.

"Oh, my..." Tsumugi was starry-eyed. "WOW!"

Two beautiful days in a row! What a joy! What a wonderful life!

Ritsu sighed. That really ought to get a few guys going after Sawa-chan... but they would soon find that she was the biggest pervert of all...

The doors of the music room suddenly burst open, and a gaggle of girls fell all over each other.

"Who are you?"

"We're here to see her!"

"Hyoooooooooo!"

"No, we're not from the Mio-chan fanclub."

Each of them produced a card with Yui's picture on it.

Azusa's eyes flatlined. "Yui-senpai... I don't believe this."

One by one, the fangirls gave tribute. It was a veritable catalogue of everyday items, made sacred by a simple neoprint of their idol.

"Yui-chan cookies!"

"Yui-chan mochi!"

"Yui-chan strawberries!"

"Yui-chan takuan!"

"Yui-chan okonomiyaki!"

"Yui-chan protractors!"

A petite first year student was last to present her offering.

"Sorry I'm late!" She dragged in a sculpture, almost as tall as she was, and probably heavier.

"Yui-chan froggie!" she proclaimed proudly.

A familiar face appeared at the doors.

Yui ran up to her best friend, showing her the pile of goodies.

"Nodoka-chan! Look at all these presents! Isn't it wonderful to have your own fanclub?"

Nodoka remained impassive. If only she be someplace else instead...

She'd done this only once before, and it had nearly killed Yui. But she'd never shied away from any responsibility thrust upon her. She had to do her duty.

She cleared her throat. "I have a message for you, Yui."

Mio was first to realise what Nodoka was about to say. Beads of perspiration began to slide down her hime-cut locks.

"Nodoka... Does the headmaster want to see her?"

A half-eaten rice cake bounced off the floor.

"I'm... going... to get... expelled?"

Tears rained around her.

"But I don't wanna leave... I wanna be with you all... to have tea with you... to hug Azu-nyan everyday..."

Mucus dripped onto the table.

"What about the cultural festival... our Christmas concert? The New Year's shrine visit? Our performance at the Budoukan...?"

She rubbed her eyes. "Waa-haa-haa!"

"Ohhhhh..." The Yui-chan fangirls crooned in unison.

Mugi-chan was quick to offer Yui her bosom. "Stay calm, Yui-chan. There must be something we can do."

Ricchan was at Nodoka's throat. "He can't do that to her! It's not her fault that she didn't wear underwear yesterday! It was an accident, for heaven's sake!"

She turned to the guitarist, who had soaked through Mugi's sweater by now. "And she's turned over a new leaf too! Come on, Yui! Show her what you're wearing today!"

"If he does this... I assure you that Yui-chan won't be the only one who'll be asked to leave," Sawa-chan muttered darkly, taking out several pictures from a secret compartment of her bra.

Azusa-chan hung her head. So, was this how the light music club would come to an end?

"Oww!"

"You and your stupid ideas! It's all your fault, Ritsu!"

She rubbed the head bun which Mio had just given her. But a hard knock, like the proverbial apple, was what she needed to come up with a cunning plan to allow Yui to unseal her fate.

"But... there is a way out, you know. You and your sister look so alike. If Ui is willing to..."

"Aiyah!" Another, smaller head bun now grew atop the first.

"Oi! Do you really want to get Ui into trouble as well?"

The council president burst into laughter.

"You heartless bastard!"

"Nodoka... chan..." Yui cried even more. She was receiving not even an iota of sympathy from her oldest friend.

All of the fangirls started tracing imaginary hearts in the air, big ones... and small ones.

"Moe... moe... KYUN!"

"All of you are evil! EVIL!"

It was a full five minutes before Nodoka was finally able to speak coherently.

"What are you talking about? It's just a message from the Yui-chan fanclub."

Everyone fell silent.

"Eh?" The tears were suddenly gone, as if someone had turned off a tap.

"Yui-chan, we wish to express our admiration for you. For only you will take the path no one travels. Only you will seek out what you desire, do what your heart dictates, no matter what happens, regardless of warnings. You are Yui, the unique! To us all, you are the Heroine With No Fear! We love you, Yui-chan!"

Nodoka exhaled loudly. Her duty was done. It was time for her to go far, far away. To Irkutsk, perhaps. And take a nice, long shower.

"E-he-he..." Yui blushed and giggled, scratching her head.

But that look on Yui's face... it was well worth the indignity of it all just to see it.

"YUI-CHAN DAISUKI!"

The girls mobbed her.

-X-X-X-X-X- 

_Several months later..._

"... Thank you everybody, for loving me so much. I've come up with a song, and I'll share it with you, just because I love you too!"

Yui wheeled around to face her band, their faces alight just like hers.

"_Utauyo! MIRACLE!_"

"One, two, three!"

_Minna daisuki! _

_So let's get this miraculous concert started!_

_Let's sing! Let's sing! It's the best way to deliver my love!_

_Even if my song won't reach you, or if the lyrics are bad,_

_I want to deliver my soul to you! _

The girls rose from their tables, their tea and cakes forgotten, clapping, cheering, screaming, stomping.

"Yui-chan! Yui-chan! Yui-chan!"

That warm, fuzzy feeling... it was so thick she could wear it.

She fingered the card in her hand once again... the very first card that was issued.

Behind her, Jun-chan mopped her brow. "Hmph... Everything seems to be going according to plan." She sighed for the umpteenth time this week, "Why am I even here doing this?"

Ui didn't have to give an answer. It was the same reason why Nodoka-chan was prepared to bail out the light music club so many times, why Azusa-chan had joined up in the first place, why HTT hadn't broken up long ago. It was pure brilliance, with a little bit of luck coming in at just the opportune moment.

_Daisuki! Daisuki!_

_Thank you for loving me back!_

_I'll sing for you! I'll sing for you now!_

_I'll sing of my love, my endless song!_

"Onee-chan... they all love you."

... And it was all because of her panties.

_Fin_


	2. Notes

I've always wanted to write something erotic, but still retaining some semblance of tastefulness. It has to be something that you can relate to, which doesn't require you to suspend disbelief toomuch (but you could argue that K-ON! is one huge, shark-jumping exercise), something which might plausibly happen were you actually living in the K-ON!iverse.

So you have Yui playing the brown note, and soiling her underwear. And going commando. And schoolgirls all going mad over her because of it.

Credit must go to Coalguys for subbing each episode as it comes, and for their translation of the theme song _Utauyo! MIRACLE_, which I have changed just a little bit for effect. Without their help, the magic of K-ON! would remain just a mystery.

May we see more of Yui-chan and the others in future (come on, Kakifly-sensei, don't let this end yet).

And thank you for reading this! Minna daisuki!


End file.
